What I've learned
Eat slowly. Listen to the entire album.
When I sent out the first edition of this newsletter in May, we were in the middle of lockdown, all jointly-tasked with learning to become better at being with ourselves. This week, as I send out my 30th newsletter and the final edition for 2020, a 90-year-old in Britain has become the first person in the world to receive the Pfizer vaccine and we’ve almost made it through the year that many people wanted to cancel.
Each of us has grappled with something different this year, be it loneliness, or economic uncertainty, or losing a loved one or losing good health; or, simply, coping with the ‘new normal’ that feels a little like permanent uncertainty. As a result, we’ve each learned something different.
Each week, I usually write about the wisdom I have stumbled upon - be it a quote, or article, or book - and pair it with my own loose thoughts. Or I write about what I’m feeling, and pair it with the wisdom of others. This week, though, I will not be leaning on Quincy Jones or a New Yorker staff writer or Dave Chappelle. I have instead written a list of what I’ve learned this year. Some parts of it may apply to you, some may not, but take from it what is useful. I have also curated a list of my favourite music, articles, and books of 2020. I hope these lists will keep you company over the summer and, in particular, those slow, sun-drenched afternoons.
I am taking an extended break from this newsletter, to refuel, reenergise, and return with bigger and better thoughts. Next year it may look a little different, so if there is anything you want more of, or anything don’t want me to change, send me a note at em@emilyjbrooks.com. In the meantime, enjoy the break, and I will be back in the first week of February when, perhaps, your New Year’s Resolutions have slipped, and you’re ready to start all over again. We all know February is when the year really begins. Thank you to every single one of you for starting your Friday mornings with me. For reading me, for supporting me, for writing to me.
Stay safe and take care.
Em x
What I’ve learned
Our problems change, but the solutions remain the same.
Work out what makes you feel good, and do more of it.
Go for the swim.
Compare down, not up.
Watch the sunset, seek awe daily, and pay attention to the problems of the world. Each will make you - and whatever you’re dealing with - feel small. Insignificance can be a useful feeling.
There is no better high than your morning coffee.
The second coffee will never beat the first.
Talking about others will never make you feel better.
Turn off Netflix. Pick up the book.
Basquiat said, “Art is how we decorate space, music is how we decorate time.” Decorate often and decorate well.
Happiness is found in small, ordinary moments. Pay attention.
An imagination allows you to see possibilities greater than your current reality. It also allows you to empathise with those who have had a different life experience. Imagination is the key to progress. Foster it.
Looking back will help you move forward.
You rarely do it, but you always feel better when you wake up with the first alarm.
If you have to clean the house, listen to a podcast - so the unpaid work isn’t time wasted.
Nature will fix you when times are tough, and sustain you when times are good.
Eat slowly. Listen to the entire album.
Seek out advice, but know when to stop.
Your coffee shop will become your church. Choose wisely and arrive every morning with a smile.
If you feel like you’ve worked everything out, it won’t be for long. You’re in constant evolution.
Set habits, not goals.
On a weeknight, the second glass of wine is where you should stop.
Every time you return to the now, it’s a victory. Do it again. The small victories add up.
Write it down.
Some albums I’ve loved in 2020:
Set My Heart On Fire Immediately, Perfume Genius
Punisher, Phoebe Bridgers
3.15.20, Childish Gambino
Græ, Moses Sumney
The Slow Rush, Tame Impala
Some playlists I’ve made in 2020:
Salt, Gin, Cucumber. My summer playlist: made for those slow, sun-drenched afternoons.
2020, The Year Of Self-Reliance. Every song - old and new - that I've stumbled upon and loved this year.
Some (old and new) books I’ve loved in 2020:
How To Do Nothing, Jenny Odell
The Cost of Living, Deborah Levy
Girl, Woman, Other, Bernadine Evaristo
Rodham, Curtis Sittenfeld
Phosphorescence, Julia Baird
Intimations, Zadie Smith
Play It As It Lays, Joan Didion
The Fire Next Time, James Baldwin
Some articles I’ve loved in 2020:
This profile on Mariah Carey, Vulture
Ex Dysmorphia, Airmail
The Biden Era Begins, The New Yorker
This profile on Harry Styles, Vogue
Our Shared Unsharing, The Cut
Sweatpants Forever, The New York Times Magazine
The Trayvon Generation, The New Yorker
How do I know I'm on the right path?The Red Hand Files
When Becky Yells At You, The Cut
John Lewis' final words, The New York Times
Kanye West Is Publicly Struggling. We Need To Give Him Grace, BuzzFeed News
Michaela the Destroyer, Vulture
Celebrity Culture Is Burning, The New York Times
This profile on Angela Davis, T Magazine
Your 'Surge Capacity' is Depleted - It's Why You Feel Awful, Medium
Nannies Tell the Truth About Working During the Coronavirus, The Cut
Enter Planet Miranda July, Vulture
America's first female recession, The 19th
Are You Aging Correctly?The Cut
Ruth Bader Ginsburg, The Great Equalizer, The New Yorker
What Happened to Van Kilmer? He's Just Starting to Figure It Out, The New York Times Magazine
Jia Tolentino on Practicing the Discipline of Hope, Interview Magazine
The Rise and Fall of Getting Things Done, The New Yorker
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